 bonjour ~
Welcome to the twenties world! I was once told that the twenties are the best years to make an account of precious memories of life, dreams and love–doing so in the most vibrant manner possible.
 : afeeqah azhar, 19 march, malaysian .
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I've awakened
written on Thursday, November 4, 2010 @ 9:13 PM ✈
I hope you’ve had an awesome deepavali school break because I did; just very unproductive when it comes to school. I figured that since this week ahead would be the only week without exam stress because results are finally out! Which also means the one where I have to get most of my work done - rangers, class certs, multimedia prefetcs & etc; I would need to catch up with more rest before the long haul. Many many tiring nights ahead, sometimes it gets so tiring that i cant even open my eyes. I understand that I’ve not been able to fully comply to this whole blogging thing; its not because I’ve lost passion, I guess I just needed time to fix the broken pieces. Okay, enough about work. Shush. The previous week is a long long week. Alot to say, alot to share. First, about my workplace. I've found a new job to replace the old one, i was very happy at that moment. Bit then it turned out not really well. The place is horrible. I worked for one day, and i left. I could not cope with all the commotions (the boss scolded the supervisor until she cried), the rush of time, the lack of technology and etc. I always thought SP suck. Now, i realised grass is not always greener on the other side. I’ve reached this point of my life where I know that life will always be a tough one; each time when you feel like giving up, always remember why you chose to hold on in the very first place. I’ve promised myself after my one day experience in my new workplace (a company called CV), I’ll never return there forever, i'll stay in SP forever, and i'll never ever to get angry and in anyway generate ill feelings towards SP ever again. I am pleaded guilty for causing so much unnecessary dramas in the past and realize now that anger covers my vision. I’m ready to take on the world in the old place again; I’m really blessed. Its been the toughest week of my life to be frank, and boy I am alive. Don’t know if this would inspire anyone, but if you’re reading this; I hope this reaches out to you that life is something worth fighting for. I’ve been fighting my own demons all my life. Recently, it overpowered me. I felt a sudden adrenalin to change work, and i did; then i regretted. Then on, vowed to be a better sales assistant in SP as time goes; I think my strength has just tripled up from before. I seriously don’t give a jack shit about anything anymore, eventhough i still receive the same low salary, long working hours & heavy workloads. I'm done being angry seriously. Yesterday, when i went back to SP Gurney to work, i felt like i'm in HEAVEN. No joking, its real. Lastly, i realised, the best thing for me is right in front of my eyes and yet i did not appreciate it before. Silly me. Labels: CRAP, GURNEY, RAYNILLE THINKS ALOT, SCHOOL, WORK
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I've awakened
written on Thursday, November 4, 2010 @ 9:13 PM ✈
I hope you’ve had an awesome deepavali school break because I did; just very unproductive when it comes to school. I figured that since this week ahead would be the only week without exam stress because results are finally out! Which also means the one where I have to get most of my work done - rangers, class certs, multimedia prefetcs & etc; I would need to catch up with more rest before the long haul. Many many tiring nights ahead, sometimes it gets so tiring that i cant even open my eyes. I understand that I’ve not been able to fully comply to this whole blogging thing; its not because I’ve lost passion, I guess I just needed time to fix the broken pieces. Okay, enough about work. Shush. The previous week is a long long week. Alot to say, alot to share. First, about my workplace. I've found a new job to replace the old one, i was very happy at that moment. Bit then it turned out not really well. The place is horrible. I worked for one day, and i left. I could not cope with all the commotions (the boss scolded the supervisor until she cried), the rush of time, the lack of technology and etc. I always thought SP suck. Now, i realised grass is not always greener on the other side. I’ve reached this point of my life where I know that life will always be a tough one; each time when you feel like giving up, always remember why you chose to hold on in the very first place. I’ve promised myself after my one day experience in my new workplace (a company called CV), I’ll never return there forever, i'll stay in SP forever, and i'll never ever to get angry and in anyway generate ill feelings towards SP ever again. I am pleaded guilty for causing so much unnecessary dramas in the past and realize now that anger covers my vision. I’m ready to take on the world in the old place again; I’m really blessed. Its been the toughest week of my life to be frank, and boy I am alive. Don’t know if this would inspire anyone, but if you’re reading this; I hope this reaches out to you that life is something worth fighting for. I’ve been fighting my own demons all my life. Recently, it overpowered me. I felt a sudden adrenalin to change work, and i did; then i regretted. Then on, vowed to be a better sales assistant in SP as time goes; I think my strength has just tripled up from before. I seriously don’t give a jack shit about anything anymore, eventhough i still receive the same low salary, long working hours & heavy workloads. I'm done being angry seriously. Yesterday, when i went back to SP Gurney to work, i felt like i'm in HEAVEN. No joking, its real. Lastly, i realised, the best thing for me is right in front of my eyes and yet i did not appreciate it before. Silly me. Labels: CRAP, GURNEY, RAYNILLE THINKS ALOT, SCHOOL, WORK
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we live under the same sky
“To put away aimlessness and weakness, and to begin to think with purpose, is to enter the ranks of those strong ones who only recognize failure as one of the pathways to attainment; who make all conditions serve them, and who think strongly, attempt fearlessly, and accomplish masterfully.”
- James Allen Quotes
Sometimes I wonder how people see me and what they think of me. It scares me a bit, honestly. I am sure though, that what they think of me,
what they think my life is, is a complete misperception. I have always tried to show myself as a carefree person, as someone who wont get bothered
because of public judgements. I am sure my friend and family think there is nothing going wrong in my life, that I do not worry enough, that
I am always happy. And I am sure they probably somewhat hate me for it because, lets admit it, there is nothing worse than seeing someone
who is life seems so perfect while yours is a complete mess. Truth is, I have become an expert at pretending. I think we are all experts
or at least we are getting there.
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